Can Happiness Be Rated?

By Anand Krishna  |   Submitted On December 13, 2007

The May 7, 2007 issue of Newsweek carried an article by Rana Foroohar on "The Joy of Economics". The writer quotes from an in-depth survey report on Happiness, the product of research by scientists at Erasmus University Rotterdam in the Netherlands.

Ten countries each from Denmark to Mexico, Tanzania to Russia and Egypt to India were rated respectively as "The Happiest Nations", "The Least-Happy Nations" and "Countries with the Biggest Disparity between Happy and Unhappy Citizens".

The Happiest Nation, according to the Survey, was Denmark with 8.2 rating in the 0-to10 Scale. Switzerland, Austria, Iceland, Finland, Australia, Canada, Ireland, Luxembourg and Mexico did not do badly. They rated between 8.1 and 7.6.

The Least Happy Nations were Tanzania (3.2), Zimbabwe, Moldova, Ukraine, Armenia, Belarus, Georgia, Bulgaria, Pakistan and Russia (4.4). Surprisingly, Pakistan, with political turmoil and instability ever since its conception, did not rate very badly. At 4.3, they were just 0.1 less happy than the Russians.

Now, the last category: "The Countries With the Biggest Disparity Between Happy and Unhappy Citizens"...... Egypt topped the list, and India along with Nigeria, Kyrgyzstan and Turkey were at the bottom of the list.

In the above said special report prepared by Rana Foroohar for the magazine, there are some interesting points which deserve some contemplation:

Wealth alone isn't necessarily what makes us happy. After a certain income cap, we simply don't get any happier.Rather than telling people to work harder, politicians can discuss work-life balance.

The happiest countries cited in the report, i.e. the Scandinavian Countries, also rank high on their suicide rate. Surprisingly, countries rating low on the Happiness Scale, report fewer suicide cases. So, the question is: Can Happiness be Measured and Scaled? Can it be rated?

What is Happiness?

Can we define the word and standardize such definition for all humanity?

Prince Siddhartha leaves his palace to find happiness in the solitude of forest. His search for happiness finally leads him to meditation, to the meditative way of life. Not so with Prophet Muhammad, he found happiness in serving the society as a Statesman and a Man of God. Jesus finds happiness in the separation of Caesar's worldly kingdom from The Heavenly Kingdom of God. Krishna is trying to create such a kingdom in this very world. What is Happiness?

A monk is happy to live on charity. A clergy works for his living; he may even own business, indeed businesses. The Newsweek report shyly admits that "Wealth alone isn't necessarily what makes us happy" - the facts on the ground prove that "Wealth has No Connection Whatsoever with Happiness". The Buddhist, the Hindus, and the Christian monks, as well as the Muslim Sufi Fakirs find happiness in giving up of wealth. They may not number much, but when you think of their influence on the society - you will be surprised!

People have different standards, different paradigms, different conditionings and ways of thinking. And, they define "Happiness" according to their different mindsets. So, it is simply not possible to rate happiness.

Apparently, Newsweek did realize this.

They invited the visitors to their website to vote for either happiness could be rated or not. One could also tick the box for "I don't know". Majority agreed that happiness Could not be rated!

Indeed, Happiness Cannot be Rated.

And, that explains why "after a certain income cap, we simply don't get any happier". In his May 2, 2007 On-Line Report, BBC News Home Editor Mark Easton presents very interesting facts:

"Britain is less happy than in the 1950s - despite the fact that we are three times richer. The proportion of people saying they are 'very happy' has fallen from 52% in 1957 to just 36% today. The story of wealth failing to translate into extra happiness is the story of the Western world.

"In almost every developed country, happiness levels have remained largely static over the past 50 years - despite huge increases in income.

What the happiness research suggests is that once average incomes reach about £10,000 a year, extra money does not make a country any happier.

In our opinion poll we asked whether the government's prime objective should be the 'greatest happiness' or the 'greatest wealth'.

A remarkable 81% wanted happiness as the goal. Only 13% wanted greatest wealth.
Should schoolchildren be taught how to be happy?......(asked) whether they thought schools should put more emphasis on teaching students how to achieve a happy personal life and less on educating them for the world of work. A majority - 52% agreed that more emphasis should be placed on happiness - 43% disagreed."

Less friendly?

The poll asked whether people felt their neighbourhood was more or less friendly now than it was 10 years ago. 43% said less friendly, compared to 22% of people who said it was friendlier.

So what makes us happy? Almost half of people - 48% - say that relationships are the biggest factor in making them happy. Second is health on 24%. When we asked people to choose the two most important sources of happiness in their lives, out of 1001 people only 77 people said work fulfilment

According to the science of happiness, friends are crucial to our well-being. Yet according to our opinion poll, most of us speak to only a small number of close friends every week. Six out of 10 people spoke to five friends or fewer each week. Two out of 10 spoke to only one or two friends. And one person in 25 talked to no friends at all.

Contentment

We also asked people to say, in their own words, what happiness meant to them. According to analysis by Ilona Boniwell, a psychologist at Oxford Brooke's University, most people's definition involved family and friends.

But the results threw up a surprise. The second largest group of responses centered around contentment and inner peace.

It does appear that many people's happiness is about escaping the stress and pace of modern life.

So, most of the people related Happiness with Relation, Contentment and Inner Peace. We can safely conclude that Happiness is not material well being. It is the Emotional and Mental Well Being. Moreover, when we talk of "Inner Peace" and not just "Peace" - we are already on the periphery of Spirituality.

I remember a meeting at the office of one of country's high officials, attended by a handful of "the chosen ones". People considered as the cream of society. For whatever reason, yours truly was included in the list. We were invited to do some brain-storming and find solutions for various problems faced by the nation. I am talking about Indonesia.

Most of the dignitaries present somehow connected all the problems with material well being. One of them went so far to say that, "Once the stomachs are filled, all our problems are solved. We can get our people to do anything for the state."

What a view, what an opinion!

And no-one objected to it, with the exception of yours truly. Then, after I presented my thoughts and offered some solutions - a dignified old lady, teacher by profession, came forward to second me. Just two of us could really see that "Happiness was not Material". That was a couple of years back - back in 2005.

Interestingly, most of the dignitaries present had a record of attending one of nation's leading motivators who speaks on "non material well being" of individual. In fact, quite a few of them were part of the motivators organization and training program. What a tragedy!

The motivator himself, although speaking on non-material, rather spiritual well being, apparently cannot identify true joy and happiness related to the spirit. He cannot differentiate them from the sensory pleasure and bodily comfort. Mind you, he is not alone. With him stand some of our finest brains. What a tragedy!

Matter or money specifically, is compared to a pair of shoes by my Guru: "You cannot wear them if they are very loose or very tight. They should be fitting, just the right size". Just enough is right. The latest survey report cited by BBC News Editor endorses this view.

Coming back to the most important factors related with Happiness - Relation, Contentment and Inner Peace - each of the Trio respectively represents one layer of our Consciousness.

Relation is related with the Emotional Layer. Contentment is the result of sane reasoning. It is the blossoming of our Faculty of Discrimination, and that is part of the Layer of Intelligence. Here, I separate Intelligence from Intellectuality. A man of letters, a scholar with a mile long list of degrees after his name, is perhaps intellectual. But, he may not have an inkling of what intelligence is. Intelligence is a matter of soul. It goes beyond bookish knowledge. It is the inherent Knowingness. It is the inborn, inherent knowledge of an infant, by which it finds the nipple of its mother.

Knowledge alone cannot make you content. It is the Knowingness that knowledge is not all and that it cannot make you content - that makes one content. This Knowingness is verily Intelligence.

Knowledge and Intellect tend to work with facts. They need proofs. Knowingness or Intelligence works with truth - The Truth. It does not need any proof. It is a proof unto itself. It is the Instincts in Animals, and the Intuition in Humans.

Third important factor in securing Happiness is Inner Peace. And, this is an "all soul affair". This is the periphery of our Spiritual Layer. One more step, and you enter the realm of Pure Spirituality, where Happiness turns into Bliss. In the language of our ancient seers - it is The Aananda. This Aananda is actually what all of us are striving for, knowingly or unknowingly, wittingly or unwittingly.

Indeed in our relation with the world and in our sense of contentment and inner peace - it is actually the Pure Bliss or Aananda that we are looking for. Our Search can only end when we attain to that supreme state of Total and Perfect Well Being - where even imperfections are so perfectly imperfect that you cannot differentiate them from The Perfection.

This state of Supreme Bliss or Aananda cannot be described in words. It can be realized in the spirit. And, such realization alone can make us truly happy!

When a man or a woman of such realization comes down from his or her spiritual heights, we have a Gandhi, a Martin Luther King, Jr, a Mother Theresa, and a Sukarno. Even today we have such men and women around us. Alas, my country, my nation, my people do not recognize them. What greater tragedy can befall a country where the children of spirit, where the people with realization are not honored!

We need Newsweek and BBC to open our eyes. We need World Bank and International Monetary Fund to help us out of economic crisis of our own making. We need the Middle East to teach us culture, economics, even dress code. The latest is in the field of agriculture - I hear the Communist China will be sending their farmers to teach our farmers how to cultivate our land.

There are Happy Nations and Least Happy Nations, and there are Countries with the Biggest Disparity between Happy and Unhappy Citizens..... I went through all the three lists, and tried to find my country, my nation. It was not mentioned in any of the lists. Where are we? Where do we stand? How are we faring?

Happiness cannot be rated, yes.

Happiness is not even the Last Frontier; there is still the State of Supreme Bliss or Aananda - yes. But, how can we ever achieve that state if we have not even tasted happiness?

Far from being a happy nation, my country may not even know the meaning of happiness. We are happy when a clergy intimidates us with hellfire and we shed tears out of fear. We are happy to see a bunch of hooligans hijacking the whole nation in the name of religion.

Wake up my country, my nation!

Wake up my brothers, my sisters, my countrymen and women; wake up to secure your place in the civilization of the day. You have had some very happy moments in the past, but a much happier life awaits you in future. Wake up to that future, that starts now, this very moment. Fill this day with happiness, so your tomorrows can be happy too!

The lessons that West is just learning come from you.

You have inherited those lessons from your ancestors, from your seers and sages, from your men and women of wisdom, from your long history in the past. Whenever you neglected those lessons, whenever you rejected the local wisdom - you lost your dignity. You were chained and enslaved by the foreigners. Allow not that history of shame repeat itself, wake up.

Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Anand_Krishna/15263
3

Turning 60 During a Pandemic

 

Turning 60 During a Pandemic

By Julie Gorges  |   Submitted On November 10, 2020

  

 

Last week, I turned 60.

Maybe in different times, I would be upset by the fact that most my life is over. However, in the midst of the pandemic and civil unrest, this landmark birthday seems like a minor thing.

Instead, this turning point in my life seems like the perfect time to reflect and count my blessings. As they say, not everyone gets to be 60 and for that I am thankful. Because I'm older, I know there are simple reasons to appreciate each day of life - even during this COVID outbreak.

Like what, you ask?

After a record-breaking summer of heat with 146 days of 100-plus temperatures this year, fall finally arrived in the California desert where I live. Last week, my husband and I sat outside on our courtyard. Mars shone brightly above us. We enjoyed a barbecued steak dinner and listened to romantic music.

These are the things that bring me joy.

Because of the pandemic, I pretty much missed my youngest grandchild, Paige's second year of life. She thinks I live in a phone. Last week, we called my youngest son, Christopher, and his wife, Johnni, and I sounded upset. Paige grabbed the phone and looked at me with her big blue eyes and asked, "What happened, Grandma?" She looked at me seriously, like she was eager to listen, and really cared. And she's two. My heart swelled.

These are the things that bring me joy.

Throughout this pandemic, my friends have dropped off small homemade gifts, sent flowers and cards, and provided much needed support and love. My family lives across the street and always have a listening ear, willing to help me in any way. My other grandchildren live with me along with my oldest son, Jonathan, so thankfully I'm not deprived of their company during this pandemic. My 9-year-old granddaughter, River, proudly showed me how she's learning to skate with her new teal roller skates and matching helmet. She described how she can only wear clothes that match. My 11-year-old grandson, Rowan, couldn't wait to show me his tomato plants and a playground he built for his two parakeets created out of sticks and other homemade materials.

These are the things that bring me joy.

So, this is the thing. Once you stop focusing on the fact that life is passing by faster than you ever imagined and lamenting those extra wrinkles - you can find many reasons to be happy you're 60 years old. Although this has been a difficult year in many ways, I search for ways to stay calm, trust in God, and focus on the positive.

After all, at 60, I know what matters. I fully realize the importance of my spiritual needs, relationships, my health, and being compassionate. I have weathered storms and know that I'll survive. I appreciate a good laugh. I understand my priorities. I am more confident and feel comfortable in my own skin. I actually wasn't born yesterday and have gained some invaluable wisdom along the way.

Besides, turning 60 is sorta liberating.

Last week, I was sitting in my courtyard with classic 60s music blaring in my earbuds. Let's face it, I was rocking out - I mean full on with arms swinging above my head - with my eyes closed. Okay, so maybe I had a glass of wine and, by the way, I really like to dance. Suddenly, I heard a noise at the gate and opened my eyes. It was the UPS man delivering a package with a huge grin on his face.

In my younger years, I would have died of embarrassment. But you know what? I didn't even care. He left the package and I closed my eyes and rocked on.

That's the beauty of being 60.

Julie A. Gorges is an award-winning author and journalist writing about life after 50. Her blog, BabyBoomerBliss.net, was selected as one of the top 50 baby boomer blogs to follow in 2019 by Feedspot. Her award-winning book, "I'm Your Daughter, Julie: Caring for a Parent with Dementia" is available on Amazon. To learn more about Julie, visit her author website at juliegorges.com.

Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Julie_Gorges/1755531

 

The Power of Practicing Gratitude and Focus

 

The Power of Practicing Gratitude and Focus

By Val Heart  |   Submitted On November 17, 2020

  

Enjoying the Gifts of Focus and Practicing Gratitude

Practicing gratitude is such a remarkable thing to do, I've made it a lifelong, daily process. And it's one of the first steps in communicating with animals.

Did you know that what you focus on expands?

It's true. Your body, mind and spirit are like a computer. So similar to when you search for something on Google, it uses your focus to determine what you want more of.

It doesn't judge or determine right or wrong; it doesn't decide if this is a 'good' focus or 'bad' one.

It just checks to see what you're looking at and gives you more of that by crowding out all the rest.

It follows your thoughts which are further reinforced by the emotional energy you give your focus.

That's it.

And by the way, it tends to ignore the weaker energies of wishing, hoping and negatives (like don't, shouldn't, or no).

If you focus on your problems, your bodymind and spirit understand that this is what's important to you.

Because that's what you are spending so much effort, energy and time dwelling on, it must be true.

So your bodymind naturally believes that you obviously want more of that, and is happy to oblige by giving you more problems.

If you focus on what you want instead, then that's what your bodymind enhances for you.

That's true of your relationships, your work, your health

And it's especially true of working with your animals.

When you focus on what's not working or what is upsetting to you about their behavior or health issue, they feel your focus, see what you are holding in your mind's eye, and pick up the strong emotions.

Then they get to interpret the communication for meaning, based on their viewpoint, experience and history.

The part about "I really wish you wouldn't do (that)" gets lost because what you don't want is crowding your thoughts, your mental monitor and your imagination.

If you focus on wishing your dog wouldn't get on the couch, then what they hear is all about being on the couch.

And they usually feel some excitement about that because you're excited energetically.

If you focus on your horse being so heavy in your hands, they get that you must like that because you are focusing so much on it.

So they keep doing it, maybe even more than before... until they pull you out right of the saddle.

If you focus on your cat's scratching the furniture, then they see the images you keep sending them. And will be happy to do it again, and again, and again and...

So what can you do to correct these and other problems?

Try focusing on what you DO want them to do. Feel how wonderful it would be if they did that (practicing gratitude) and imagine the great rewards they'd get if they did that instead. How fun it would be, how proud you would feel of them, what a joy they are to you...

Many times bad behavior or performance is simply a matter of misunderstanding your focus. It's all a matter of intention, perspective and communication, followed by gratitude.

"What lies before us & what lies behind us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when we bring what is within out into the world, miracles happen." -Henry David Thoreau

______________________________________________________________

Val Heart got her start in animal communication in 1993 when an injured mare spontaneously told her why the wound on her hip wouldn't heal. Through the conversation, Val and the owner witnessed with astonishment as the wound simply disappeared right before their eyes as she shared her story! Called The Real Dr Doolittle, Val is a leading animal communication expert, internationally recognized animal whisperer, and master healer for people and pets. Not the typical animal communicator, her specialty is the H.E.A.R.T System for Solving Problems with Pets.

Work with Val at https://ValHeart.com.

Would you like to learn how to talk to animals? Get your free eBook at The Heart School of Animal Communication and the BEST Online Animal Talk Coaching & Mastery Club at https://learnhowtotalktoanimals.com/ © Heart Communication Enterprises LLC

Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Val_Heart/186713

 

How To Develop a KILLER Sense Of Humor! — 3 Ways To Be Funny In Conversations

 

Mindfulness Attitudes - Non-Judgment

 Mindfulness Attitudes - Non-Judgment By Helen M Morris | Submitted On November 26, 2020 

What do we mean by non-judgment in the context of mindfulness, why is non-judgment part of the attitudes of mindfulness? It is perhaps easier to begin with what non-judgment is not, it is not lack of care, or distancing yourself so far from a situation that it cannot touch you. Being non-judgmental does not make you reckless and choose not to heed sensible safety precautions. It is not becoming cold or lacking in compassion. Non-judgment is about being aware of the judgments that we make every day, all the time. Take a moment to be aware of the thoughts in your mind right now. How do you react to them? 

Often, we will respond with judgment to our thoughts and feelings - 'this is good' or 'this is bad'; 'this is right' or 'this is wrong'. Over time our responses become habitual and form an automatic response to specific thoughts or feelings. This is one of the hardest concepts that mindfulness suggests, because we are programmed to judge from our earliest experiences. It's not just what we think and feel, we also make judgments about taste, smell, texture, sound and sight. Some people are optimistic, preferring to look with a positive perspective on any situation or thought. We all have preferences and judging is deeply engrained into our psyche. From the word go people are judged and evaluated: good boy, good girl, and so on are the responses adults utter when children manage a new skill.

 Jon Kabat-Zinn uses non-judging as part of his definition of mindfulness: Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally. Awareness of our own thoughts and feelings is one of the approaches of mindfulness, but simply being aware of them is not enough to reduce their impact on us. Non-judging brings in the concept of acceptance (another mindfulness attitude) enabling us to live with our thoughts and feelings. Consider for a moment the process of grieving. 

You may have experienced this for yourself or witnessed someone else going through it. There is no set timescale associated to the process, but it is generally recognised that there are various stages of grief that most people will endure. These are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This article is not trying to address those stages, but the concluding stage, acceptance, is when we achieve peace and are able to live with the grief that will be part of our lives forever. Having personal experience of the loss of a parent whilst I was at a vulnerable age, I recognise that I will always miss my mother, be sad that she is not in my life, and indeed, missed so much of my life, but I am able to continue with that feeling as an accepted part of me. We readily accept that someone who has lost a loved one will be able to live with their feeling of grief, assigning no judgment to it. But we do not apply the same approach to any of our other emotions. We apply judgment to our other emotions, calling them good or bad. Anger is bad, joy is good, irritation is bad and so on. But these emotions are no more positive or negative than grief. We are making judgments about them based on the reactions we have and the situations we are in when we feel those emotions. So how can we apply non-judgment, and what benefit does it bring to our lives? 

Mindfulness allows us to recognise emotions and be aware of the sensations they create in our bodies. Once we are aware of the sensations that these emotions create, we can be alerted to their presence and be prepared for the impact they have on us. Awareness can act as an early warning system so that we can engage with our emotions through choice, instead by of habit or judgment. It is not always a bad thing to feel angry, however if our reaction to anger is always to be violent, that is unacceptable. If we can separate the emotion from the automatic response, we may be able to choose the response we make. In a situation where anger may cause violence, it may be easy to see that separating the emotion from the action is a benefit. What could be the benefit of separating other emotions from their response? 

Anxiety can cause our stress response to trigger unnecessarily, which is not healthy for our mental or physical well-being. If we can manage our reactions, we may be able to remain calm and choose our behaviour. Most importantly, non-judgment is about accepting that it is all right to have feelings and acknowledging them, experiencing them and then being able to let them go. Thoughts and feelings are transient, they are our response to a situation, not the situation itself. Just as we can learn healthy eating habits or unlearn unhealthy habits, we can learn to have healthy thoughts and train our minds to make those habitual. "We are what we repeatedly do." Will Durant "As it is not one swallow or a fine day that makes a spring, so it is not one day or a short time that makes a man blessed and happy." Aristotle This is why mindfulness is referred to as a practice, it is a journey of self-recognition, self-awareness, enabling us to build our self-esteem. 

Developing a non-judgmental mindset can help us to remain calm in a stressful situation. It can also help with everyday tasks, enabling greater focus, concentration and attention to our undertakings. Join The Aware Mind for mindfulness practices and techniques Helen has completed a diploma in Counselling & Psychology, and has qualified as a Mindfulness Now Teacher. She has gained the training and skills to help others with their own issues and is specialising in anxiety, depression and bereavement. By practicing mindfulness and meditation, we can begin to more fully understand how our emotions, thoughts, and feelings impact our lives. Taking one small step in support of a happier, healthier, and calmer way of life, mindfulness and meditation is a great place to start. 

 Mindfulness Attitudes - Non-Judgment By Helen M Morris | Submitted On November 26, 2020

The Power of Beginning

By Estra Roell  |   Submitted On December 04, 2020 

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.

 All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no person could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now." ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 

When you commit to a direction or a goal, you begin to focus your energy and attention on it. We know from the law of attraction, whatever we place our energy, focus and attention on, we create. Good or bad. The universe simply responds to our vibration. Your vibration is the result of your thoughts. Commitment to your dream creates excitement. It's a decision and an intention to go forward. It's what lights you up! This truly is powerful. So, if you're hesitating, what's holding you back?

 Here are some common reasons people fail to commit to starting in the direction of their dreams:

 1. Overwhelm The task may seem too big when you think of the entire process to bring it about. It may feel like an exciting dream, but the idea of pulling it together is daunting. The great thing is, you don't have to do it all at once! All you need to do is take your first step. That step may just be to do some research into what you'll need to get started. Just focus on the one step before you. Even the smallest step gets your subconscious mind and the universe on board! 

2. Lack of Clarity Fuzzy ideas get fuzzy results. It's hard to commit to something when you're not clear about exactly what you want. One great tool for getting clarity is the Clarity Through Contrast exercise. You simply make a list of all the things you don't like about your current situation. Then, you take each item on your list and think, "I don't want that, so what do I want?" Then flip the unwanted item to its opposite. Now you'll have a new list with more clarity on what you want. You can try out your ideas by volunteering or speaking with someone who is doing what you are interested in doing. 

3. It Seems Too Financially Risky I never recommend anyone stop doing what's paying the bills before you have a financial cushion or have developed your idea to the extent it's bringing in a living income. Speak to your financial advisor for help. You can build on your goal while still at your current job, if you're wanting to enter an entrepreneurial venture. If you're wanting to change careers and need more training, you can begin that while still at your current job. 

4. It Seems Too Emotionally Risky Are you afraid if failing and being embarrassed? Or are you afraid of succeeding and losing your friends through jealousy? True friends will stand by you, whether you "fail" or succeed. Most successful people have failures in their past. They learn from them, adjust and move forward. This is your life and you are the one who best knows your path. If you don't go for what you want, you'll never be quite satisfied. 

5. Your Own Inner "Demons" Say You Can't Listen to your self-talk. Do you find yourself saying things like, "I don't deserve... " or "I'm just not... enough." Don't believe everything you think! Just because you have a thought, it doesn't make it true. What are some other supportive thoughts that are true? Shift your focus to affirmations such as, "I choose to know I deserve to have... " or "I've decided I can do this." Ask yourself empowering questions like, "How can this be done most easily?" Your subconscious mind will get on board with answering you. Avoid thoughts like "What if I fail?" Replace them with "What if I succeed?" "What if this all works out better than I could have imagined?" 

6. Fear of Limiting Your Freedom by Committing to a Certain Path Sometimes we're just simply afraid of committing to a path. This is especially true if you have many interests and have trouble deciding among them. The truth is, always searching around and never committing to a direction or goal is anxiety producing. It can be enervating and overwhelming. You flounder. Once you commit, you're actually freer than if you didn't. You have a clear path ahead and can put a plan in place. So, what makes your heart sing? What is it you really want? Is there a way you can blend certain interests? What are your core values? When you know these things, you're ready to commit. And when you do, you receive a surge of energy! As the quote from Goethe says, once you make a decision, the universe goes into motion to support your desires. There is power in a clear vision and taking action toward it. Make a commitment to yourself to pursue what you want and hold that vision in front of you with joy, excitement and belief. When you line up vibrationally (emotionally) with what you want, the universe will yield to you what you want. Take the actions that feel delightful to you and feel like the logical next step. No need to push or try to figure out all the steps. Just take the first one. The rest will be revealed as you go forward-and the universe provides "all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no person could have dreamed would have come his/her way." Estra Roell is a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, certified Life Purpose Coach and an advanced PSYCH-K® facilitator. She's the author of the eBook, "4 Keys to Discovering Your Life Purpose." Estra helps women who are tired of going to a "soul-sucking" job every day, just to pay the bills, to find their divine purpose and move into meaningful work they LOVE. If you hate Monday mornings, schedule your FREE Life Purpose Strategy Session with Estra at https://AmericasLifePurposeCoach.com/strategy-session or pick up your free report on "Visioning Your Purpose and Heading Toward It Today" at https://bit.ly/freeLPreport Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Estra_Roell/366734

Christmas Is More Than Jingle, Jingle

 Christmas Is More Than Jingle, Jingle

By James Snyder  |   Submitted On December 12, 2020

  

 

I have been trying lately to remember my first Christmas. I know my memory isn't perfect, but I thought maybe I could bring up some old memories of my first Christmas.

Unfortunately, I couldn't think of a thing about that first Christmas of mine. Of course, it might be that I was only five months old at the time. Still, I tried to remember some of those old Christmases in the past.

Down through the years, I have celebrated more Christmases than I want to let on. It's not that I'm old; I just haven't died yet.

The thing about Christmas was all the stuff I was getting. The first Christmas I remember, I got a bunch of presents under the tree. None of my siblings had shown up at the time, so I was the focus of several Christmases. That was the essence of real joy.

I thought Christmas was all about me and all I wanted for Christmas and all that would make me happy.

I remember my parents taking me downtown to sit on Santa's lap and tell what I wanted for Christmas. That's what I thought Christmas was all about.

I was a little disturbed when my siblings came on the scene, and Christmas was no longer all about "me." For some reason, they thought they were part of Christmas. Being the terrific brother that I am, I allowed them to have some of the Christmas time around the tree.

Then I was introduced to the fact that not only was I not the focus of Christmas but now I needed to purchase Christmas presents for my siblings. That was a hard thing to get over. What did they ever do to deserve my Christmas presents?

I finally processed that and discovered giving can also be fun.

Things went along nicely, and then another thing changed everything in my Christmas activity.

Going to a Bible school up in New York, I happened to meet a young lady. Before I could process everything, I found myself married. How that happens, men have no idea. I had to remind myself that weddings are for wives and not husbands. The husband that allows the wife to plan the wedding is a happy dude in the end.

When we got married, I did not realize how everything in my life was going to change.

Then came the first Christmas as a married man, for which I wasn't prepared.

That Christmas we spent with my wife's family. At first, I thought the whole neighborhood had come to celebrate Christmas with us. Then, much to my chagrin, I realized these were siblings to my wife. I don't remember how many there were; I couldn't count them; they were running around too fast.

I never experienced such a Christmas in all my life. The thing about it was we had to purchase gifts for all of the family. I was able to empty Wal-Mart with all of my purchases.

Opening up those gifts, I couldn't remember what I got and who I got it for. But it was the beginning of a different kind of Christmas season than I experienced up to this time.

Then other things began to happen. One by one, children came into our family. Fortunately, we only had three children, unlike my wife's parents, who had somewhere near 100, at least by my calculation.

I eventually discovered that Christmas was not about me at all. There was a major adjustment for me thinking about the Christmas season. Not being a qualified shopper, I had to rely upon my wife to do all the shopping, for which she is an expert.

It wasn't long before I realized that a Christmas song with the word "jingle" in it meant that I was supposed to spend a lot of my coin for Christmas.

Now, Christmas was not about me, or was it? It was about me paying for Christmas, and the recipients seem to be growing without stop.

I had my parents and my siblings to buy Christmas presents. I had my wife's parents and her siblings to buy Christmas presents. Then, I had my children to buy Christmas presents.

Why, oh, why is it all about "me?"

It took a while for me to come to the right conclusion that Christmas is more than "jingle, jingle." I came to that conclusion when one Christmas we were celebrating at our home, and our children and grandchildren were all around the Christmas tree opening up presents.

I sat back and just watched. Sure, I got a couple of Christmas presents. But that wasn't what Christmas was for me. I saw my family around that tree and realized that that's what Christmas was all about. Family coming together and enjoying one another.

The "jingle, jingle" was just the door that opens up the family celebration. Thinking about it, I have concluded that all the "jingle, jingle" in the world is worth every moment around that tree.

Then I thought about what the Bible said. "And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:6-7).

Christmas is all about family. God's family comes into the family through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Dr. James L. Snyder is pastor of the Family of God Fellowship, Ocala, FL 34472, where he lives with the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. Call him at 352-216-3025 or e-mail jamessnyder2@att.net. The church web site